Valcyte 1 month

I just hit the one month mark of being on Valcyte. I officially feel terrible. The new added bonus is nausea that comes on soon after I take it each morning. Yesterday Dr. Lerner gave me Zofran to help with the nausea. I've started getting headaches again (taking inderol for this) and having daily muscle pain (hot baths) and fatigue.

We hired some help with the kids and the housekeeping so that I can focus more on resting and less on managing. Dr. Lerner has been encouraging me to do this for about 6 months and was very enthusiastic that I finally did it so that we can see what happens when I get even more rest. (In bed about 20 hours a day now.)

I'm only sleeping about 10 hours a day. I feel extremely fatigued the rest of the time but anxiety is keeping me from actually sleeping more. Doc says this is okay for now as long as I'm resting. Hopefully as the nausea and anxiety die down I'll be able to sleep more and have a shot at a little more refreshment.

I'm reading a book from the UK about people who have been healed/recovered from CFS. One of the patients suggests falling asleep picturing something you want to do when you are well. In all honesty, I can't really picture myself well anymore. When I try to picture a scene I always picture myself tired and unable to keep up those whom I'm in the scene with. I can tell I'm at a point of needing hope that I will be well.

I asked Dr.Lerner's nurse on Friday if I could get in contact with one of his patients who she has seen get well. She got permission from the patient and then gave me the number of Carol*. (Not her real name.) She flies in all the way from the West Coast to see Dr. Lerner. When she first started seeing him in 2010 she was wheelchair bound because of her fatigue. Today she works out with a personal trainer and enjoys a full life. We had a great conversation and I was very encouraged. God is on the move. I am doing my best to trust not in my circumstances but in His character. He is good.

Just the facts

Really too tired to type...
Feel like I have been hit by a bus.
Pain up and down the muscles next to my spine up through my neck and my upper arms and shoulders.
Bad, bad joint pain in my knees so much so that it hurts to walk.
Headache.
Nausea.
Laying down 20-22 hours a day.
Not sleeping all of that though.
Been anxious lately. Will this ever go?
Proverbs 3:4-5 He says.